Final Chapter

I wonder how long will it take to stop me muttering about my no -fuck happened life Well， it is now I wanted to put an end on whatever I felt about adn experienced with my personal life And honestly, i am not going to stop feeling whatever emotions in my heart But at this …

Alone

Did I write somthing on this adjective？ I bet I did every night when i experience a certain drowning sensation Then I breath heavily not in a sexy way but a desprate way of trying to stay alive It happens so often nowdays Maybe it is becasue i dreamt about my death s many times …

Beautiful Things

"I just want to wrtite this befored since i will have another mental breakdown this week becasue I cant have my dream job with the almost perfect team ， well with a 70% chance im not getting it，i am not getting it but you know I dont do hopeful thinking or pray"   At some …

Misunderstanding

How hard it is to say what you actually mean？ Like the society consistently remind us to be careful with your words When we are having a conversition i just need you to be honest How hard it is to just say I  miss you and I want to say you? Instead, you said " …

Panic

It is a strange feeling to experince an outburst of panic attack I have been feeling so down for the last month with the unstable of my current situation Today I went from sad to depressed and then an extreme panic It was so bad that i had hard times to breath for about 20 …

“Hurricane”

Before I Start this, i want to deliver some good news first: The daily life routine  is back to normal  in China with the requirement of wearing mask in public. So hang in there , world. It is going to be fine.   Like summer in 2020, you are cold and  hard to predict I …

What happens next？

These days I bet we all ask the same question：“what happens next”？ There cant be a more perfect time to ask this while we are still in this pandemic Are we gonna be kind to one and another? Are we gonna tell our friends we love them or we choose to end those toxic relationship？ …

Between Us

In this time of crisis I spent a lot of time wondering in my past I am a creature of Curiousity and I just have to know what broke us apart I wondered then I found the answers when I finally see you clearly You did not look at me in the eyes and you …

Every Gradation of Light

Recently, i start to notice this emotion in me: love. The emotion i felt whenever i got a text from u, whenever i hear ur woice, whenever i saw your face.... For a long time, i am convinced you light up my world Even though my world is actually full of chaos like there is …

The Protraction of a Goodbye

We met at the worst time of our life. I was never meant to fall for you. Then time took over, my emotion changes with the way you talk and look at me. Someday,  my world crumbled , all i see is darkness. I ask u to stay , to hug, to kiss me untill …